SHAKESPEARE

When Romeo made love to Juliet, don’t you

Think his Mom got really pissed, btw? Do you

Just yank a fine young fromage like

That out of its cave, dancing:

Like her family loves herpes?

I sit on my balcony, nodding about it like 200 million other people,

With my hijack open, my mouth shining,

My eyes like adjacent smoke detectors,

Being true. Will you tell us when it is time?

It was Shakespeare’s letters 

What convinced me to drive to correspondence school,

Wanting to master comedic tap,

Buy my lunch, try to eat in / in the front

Of the Food Court, uh, “I’m all shoot up.”

But poor people look so mean when they’re doing laundry.

Two or three kick!

They might even want to operate on Juliet.

Which is like saying, “Most convicts are stupid,” or,

There’s 200 million people who wished Romeo & Juliet lived,

And went around, telling everybody, “No problem”